Third Culture Kid

By now many of my few but faithful readers will likely have heard the news that I have been accepted as a missionary to Ireland with World Harvest Mission.  This was the result of not only a long application process and years of interest, but a recent trip to Philadelphia for a conference at WHM headquarters called "A&O" week.

A&O stands for "Assessment and Orientation."  The first half of the week. we were interviewed, and after we were accepted, the rest of the week was spent in orientation.  The whole process was really good in many ways; I feel like I've found a really good organization.  There is a lot that i could talk about (and probably will eventually), but there was one session in particular that struck me.

Though we went through five interviews, including one which covered the results of our psych and personality profile tests, most of what I talked about in those times were things I already knew about myself.  In one interview, however, after recounting all the places I'd lived in chronological order, someone remarked, "You're really kind of a Third Culture Kid, aren't you?" I had no idea what he meant; I'd never heard the term before that I could recall.

So when we had a session on Third Culture Kids (or TCKs) our last day, I was totally caught off guard.  Though the term TCK has come to replace MKs in many circles, and generally refers to kids who have grown up in another country, it's really about cultures.  Psychology Wiki lists the definition as follows: Third Culture Kids (abbreviated TCKs or 3CKs or Global Nomad) "refers to someone who [as a child] has spent a significant period of time in one or more culture(s) other than his or her own, thus integrating elements of those cultures and their own birth culture, into a third culture."

Okay, you're saying to yourself, interesting, but what does that even mean?

Since I grew up in the many different cultures that make up the US, moving every few years and never really settling down, there are a lot of ways in which I myself am an adult TCK (ATCK).  I just didn't know it until now.  I knew that moving around all that time had shaped me in a lot of ways, but I didn't know there was this whole group of people out there who feel into the same category and had the same struggles.  When our facilitator listed the strengths and weaknesses that many TCKs have, I felt a little like I'd just discovered I had a medical syndrome I didn't know existed.

One site I went to looking for links and info today suggested that I'm actually either a "Domestic" TCK or a Cross Cultural Kid (CCK).  Either way, the point is, my many uprooting and cultural experiences had an effect on me.  It shaped me into who I am today: a woman who cares about many cultures and places, but can't decide where to say she is "from." Here are some other characteristics:

• Make great culture bridges. They have multiple frames of reference.
  
  
• Excellent observers of other people. They can be very observant and sensitive.
  
  
• Establish relationships quickly. They cut through many of the initial levels of diffidence when forming relationships.
  
  
• Open-minded and less prejudiced.
  
  
• Adapt quickly to unfamiliar countries and people, culturally astute, cross-culturally enriched.
  
  
• More welcoming of newcomers into a community.
  
  
• Educational achievers - a high percentage will attend university and obtain advanced degrees.
  
  
• Live more in the present and for the moment. (Pollock, 1999)

And here are some challenges:

1. Belonging everywhere and nowhere. The elusive concept of "Where is home?"
   
   
2. Difficulty with commitment to people, places, schools, or school systems as these constantly change.
   
   
3. Uncertain cultural identity.
   
   
4. Problems with decision-making.
   
   
5. Loss of relationships, community, school is a loss of their world.
   
   
6. Feeling different from others, difficult in forming peer relationships; occurs more often at university level or when returning to "passport" country, where they are misunderstood by their peers.
   
   
7. Rootlessness and restlessness. The frequent need to change countries and homes.
   
   
8. Feeling "Out of Control" and Powerless. A feeling that they have no control over events and that these are often taken out of their hands anyway by the inevitability of the move.
   
   
9. A crisis of identity - "Who am I?"

So, there are upsides and downsides to this kind of life, but in the end, I guess it's just one more thing that helped shape me into the kind of person who pursues overseas missions!  I may not be able to say where I'm from, or be any good a long range planning to know where I'll end up, but I know where I'll be by the end of next year: Ireland.

And that's enough for me right now.

There and Back Again

Whew! Well, I'm back in Pittsburgh. What a whirlwind of days it has been for me!

First, let me thank you for your prayers. It couldn't have happened without them.

Second, I'd just like to say that I loved Ireland. It was beautiful there--and we had fantastic weather!! Now, granted, some parts of Ireland looked a lot like parts of Western PA, and much of Dublin looked relatively like any other big city in the world. But then you'd see a sign in Gaelic, or see some ivy-covered ruins in the distance, and you'd know you weren't in America anymore. Not to mention the driving on the opposite side of the road thing.

I actually took over 2,000 pictures--but don't worry, I won't make you look at them all. A hefty chunk of those were more for me, and many of them are multiples of the same thing, just me trying to get the best shot possible. I truly had a blast taking pictures; it was one way I could express my love of the beauty of Ireland. I'll be posting my favorites to flickr when I get a chance.

So, now to answer the big question: am I going back to Ireland?
I believe so, yes.

I'm trying to take this slow and not get too ahead of myself. But I spent a good amount of time on the shore of the Irish Sea last week, praying and listening. Our last evening at the conference was a time of prayer, response, and communion. Before I went to that service, I felt God saying, "Go."

Let me just try to contextualize this for you a little. Many other times in my life, I have opened myself up to God, asking Him to use me and send me however he wanted. In those days, I would never have thought of Ireland. I just knew I wanted to serve Him, somewhere. Where there was a need, where I could be used. And though I always felt my time would come someday, each time I would ask God, I heard a "No, not yet."

But there I was, having heard stories from God's people who have been toiling in Ireland; and after hearing about the kinds of things they have been moved to do in their communities, I felt stirred, deeply. God has been moving in my own heart in the same ways--to desire relationship building over hit-and-run evangelism, and to reach out to the people of the community right where they are and meet them in their need, not waiting for them to come through the doors of the church. And it was in those moments, when I heard those stories, that I most deeply felt a sense of calling to join God in the work He is doing in Ireland. I heard, "Yes, Go."

I don't know exactly what this will look like; Ireland is going through a time of tremendous immigration and as a result they are beginning to write new laws. One of them that has just been passed is affecting some of the work of World Harvest missionaries there. They are unable to stay more than three years--so the people leading the program I was looking at might not be in Ireland next year.

At first that was discouraging and disheartening; but after I had a few conversations with people and let them know how truly interested I was in Ireland (and not just anywhere), they seemed willing to try to work things out. So that's where I am--preparing, beginning to move forward in faith, knowing this will be challenging, and NOT knowing exactly what shape it will take...or when it will happen.

Thank you again so much for your prayers...my trip to Ireland (though at times exhausting!) was exhilarating and beautiful. And inspiring.

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art...
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

A New Chapter

I have this ritual that I've done for the past decade or so of my life. Every year, I stay up the night before my birthday and reflect on my life. This usually involves some kind of writing, and normally it's done in a journal. But this year I decided to be different.

I'm 29 this year.

I was talking to a friend tonight, who is 20, and she was saying how she felt like she's got her whole life ahead of her--and she does. I'm nearly a decade older, and I feel the same way. Suddenly.

For a while, I was really wrestling with this whole "29" thing. I mean, let's face it. I am NOT where I thought I'd be by now. Far from it. And yet, there is a kind of freedom in that. For whatever reasons, God in His wisdom has kept me here since college. And I'm okay with that, because He's always provided for me.

But now, I sense a change on the horizon. it's like it's been there all along, just...hidden. Elusive. Tucked away.

The odd thing is, part of accepting that change means letting go of where I am now. There is an area of my life, a ministry I've been involved in for a while, that I have to leave behind, and God is using a very painful method to get me to let go. But everywhere around me, I keep hearing things that make me think that this is His plan for me. I mean, sometimes it happens this way. Caspian had to be chased out of his castle to find Narnia, right?

I'm going to Ireland this summer.

That in itself is a big deal; but I'm not going just for the prayer conference or to be a tourist. I'm thinking (& praying) about living there. Moving there. That's right, becoming a missionary.

I don't know what will happen. Maybe God will close the door, like He's closed other doors. but maybe not. Maybe it's time for me to move on again, time for another new chapter in my life.

Chesterton says: “An adventure is, by its nature, a thing that comes to us.
It is a thing that chooses us, not a thing that we choose.”

And Aslan says: "You would not have been calling me unless I had called you first."

Finally, Tolkien says: "The road goes ever on and on, down from the door where it began
....and whither then? I cannot say."

Would you continue to pray with and for me about Ireland? I wish I could be more eloquent about it, but at the moment, my heart's too full...I see blank pages before me. I feel like I'm still waiting for a sign; but really, I just want to feel supported. I want to know that's where God wants me.

And I want to sing, like Switchfoot does at the end of "Prince Caspian,"

I've been searching
For a place of my own
Now I've found it
Maybe this is home...